Hello all! Time for another blog about some Lunar Lady soul searching. This one is important to me, though, because it took me so long to realize this simple truth. Just because someone else says you're something, doesn't mean they have any clue, right or need to make you feel any certain way about yourself OTHER THAN to help themselves feel a certain way. Let me explain this in a few ways. We will explore what you might consider to be the most far out first then back to basics. Here we go!
The first reason no one has the right to project the image they hold of you onto you and then treat you according to their belief is this. In all reality, be you Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, Catholic, etc... we are all made of the same stuff. We are all made of atoms. These are bits of energy. They are not "things". Moreover, our brains which are made essentially of atoms, are comprised of millions of neurons which send messages in the form of little electric pulses. But what it DRIVING our meat suit? It's US. The real us. This physical body is only a temporary aspect of our entire exsistance. Also, being that when you take the energy our far enough, all of that energy is, in essence, connected. So, to view ourselves as separate from each other is merely a human perception and this is where it gets REAL.
The fact that we keep trying to impose an identity on ourselves is so silly! "Hey, this is what this walking meat suit represents. This ring, car, hairstyle, fashion statement, boyfriend, wife, job, career, education, experiences, mindset, belief structure, etc.... Means Me."
No... it doesn't.
YOU are an accumulated mass of vibrating energy. Some have told me that this statement is too occult for them but I disagree. I am in no way trying to seduce you to the dark side by promising evil powers to help you take over the world and wield your wicked power over Mankind. This is SCIENCE! I only seek to help you feel power in your own life, to create happiness, love, joy, friendship and prosperity in your own life. So, back on topic! YOU are an amazing compilation of atoms, formed into molecules, to cells, to organs, to organ systems, to a functioning body, to a contributing creator in this wonderfully Connected Consciousness!!! You can't represent that with any material object or clever slogan.
It took me a long time to figure this out and where I could say, "I wish I knew this a long time ago.", I wont because it was the multitude of experiences that taught me this lesson. This is where I bring it back to basics. I'm also going to get personal. Yay! Personal story time!!! How can I expect you to listen to me if I don't share how I learned it in my own life? Let's all get a little closer, shall we?
If I had a nickle for every time, scratch that. That's boring. If I had a book for every time someone told me a sentence that began with "Stacy, you are..." or "See, what your problem is..." or the dreaded, "What you need to do is...", I would have a library that would rival any collection of books in a hundred mile radius. What do they know? I don't know but for a very long time, I listened. I listened and over time, I began to believe some pretty destructive things about myself.
What happens when you have a poor self image? I can tell you what happens to me. I sit down to do something and the first stream of thoughts are, " I'm going to mess this up. This isn't going to work. Why should I think I can do this?" Thoughts vary but you get the idea. So, why try? Or let's go even deeper...
What happens in your life when the people you call your friends and loved ones, constantly tear you
down? Let me give some of my examples. I had a husband who had anger issues. His rant was that I was delusional, crazy, a whore, no one would ever want me or love me the way he did, etc. I had friends that no matter how I confided in them or looked for some sort of emotional help, I always got the same response. "Oh we like him, he's so nice to us." I felt that I must be crazy. Now that I'm older, I realize people who suffer from psychological and emotional disorders can convince people around them that they are okay while destroying the people at home. Anyhow, so I wasn't feeling support at home, I wasn't feeling support from the friends I spent the most time with and on top of that, those same friends were projecting their images onto me as well. I would get compared to sneaky ex boyfriends and other unsavory people. I believed them.
Not many of you know this but let me explain how this affected my life. My life hadn't been great for about a 9 year span of time. But three of those years were the worst. I would say it started maybe five years back. Something had happened that shook my entire world to the core and I started to draw even more inward than before. I really needed to dig myself out. But I was pretty dug in to a bad relationship and toxic friendships. Like attracts like and I was feeling very helpless and defeated. I started collecting things. I stopped cleaning. I felt tired all the time. I only got up to feed my daughter and I let my situation go to hell. All the while, on my journey down the downward spiral, there was no shortage of friends saying that I was all these things that were bad and negative. Here's the funny part. I was always helping those friends. I was always doing something they needed. I wasn't getting support but I was being put to work. And in my ex husbands case, I was being led to believe I couldn't live with out him but in all reality, I was paying all the bills. I was helping him too. I was really being a good friend and a good wife but was being brainwashed into thinking I was less than those people.
I got very tired of feeling like the loser friend that could never get anywhere in life or accomplish anything. I stopped listening. I started observing. I looked back on my own life. Have I messed up and have I stepped on some toes and broken a few hearts? Yes I have. I was much younger and I didn't have the life experience to know the consequences of such actions. I will tell you that all of those things taught me a wealth of knowledge that I NEEDED to learn. I would not be the Aware person that I am now, had it not been for those awakening and enlightening lessons. Has all that stuff happened to me? Yes. I have suffered. I have experienced all sorts of feelings and states of being. But the one I'm in now, is by far my favorite.
Here is how I got there. I realized that I am more than just a human being. I am an accumulated mass of vibrating energy that is so far more advanced than any little ego process that my brain is trying to form about itself. I do have the power to make things happen. I am loving and kind. I do want to do good things for my community. I do want to be happy and to see happiness in others. I do want to raise my vibration as well as help raise the vibration of everyone and everything around me. I do love being a woman. I do see and celebrate the differences in people and I celebrate your freedom to think and create in your life and in doing so, affecting my life and all of creation!
We can all be everything we can imagine. All we have to do is stop listening to the outside forces that help set up and promote self sabotage. Statements that begin with "You are..." or anything like that, should just be taken with a grain of salt. They don't know you and they most likely don't know themselves. Once you are in tune with the true nature of how amazing you are, why would you need to tell anyone about their flaws. You are wonderful! You are energy! Go be awesome!!!